The way to love someone
is to lightly run your finger over that person's soul
until you find a crack,
and then gently pour your love into that crack.
~Keith Miller

Thursday, July 3, 2014

107/1000 forgiven

Thursday, and hard to absorb the fact that more then half of 2014 is behind us!  It's been a busy ... stress-filled few months for me (and my entire family).  I really thought 2014 was going to be the best year ever and ... by my imperfect perspective ... it hasn't been.  I do that every year, think this year is really going to rock, and I have to admit that each year does seem to surpass the ones which came before once they have played out.  One of the things that helps me in general is the practice of gratitude.  And ... as with those things we choose to be mindful of, gratitude, as a habit or a cultivated attitude/posture takes a bit of time and focus.  
I am behind on consciously noting what I'm thankful for.   (I'm also behind on my dog walking deal and my yoga time ... maybe those are following behind the One Thousand Gifts, aka */1000 project that I'm working on ... maybe they will catch up soon.)  

Today, though, right now ...  

Psalm 32 
Blessed are the forgiven
1 Blessed is he whose transgression is forgiven, 
whose sin is covered.
Blessed is the man unto whom the Lord imputeth not iniquity, 
and in whose spirit there is no guile.
When I kept silence, 
my bones waxed old through my roaring all the day long.
For day and night thy hand was heavy upon me: 
my moisture is turned into the drought of summer. 
I acknowledge my sin unto thee, 
and mine iniquity have I not hid. 
I said, I will confess my transgressions unto the Lord
thou forgavest the iniquity of my sin. 
For this shall every one that is godly pray unto thee in a time when thou mayest be found: surely in the floods of great waters they shall not come nigh unto him.
Thou art my hiding place; 
thou shalt preserve me from trouble; 
thou shalt compass me about with songs of deliverance. 
(meaning the Lord) 
will instruct thee and teach thee in the way which thou shalt go: 
I will guide thee with mine eye.
Be ye not as the horse, 
or as the mule, 
which have no understanding: 
whose mouth must be held in with bit and bridle, 
lest they come near unto thee.
10 Many sorrows shall be to the wicked: 
but he that trusteth in the Lord, mercy shall compass him about.
11 Be glad in the Lord
and rejoice, ye righteous: 
and shout for joy, 
all ye that are upright in heart.

I'm thankful for the prayer and promise of Psalm 32. 
And I'm really glad (thankful) that it's possible for me to ask for forgiveness ... I've been angry ... and I've been fearful ... and I really don't need to be either one of those.  
It's pretty easy to see why Bonhoeffer thought that praying the Psalm was a good idea.  I really appreciate that God instructs us on how to approach Him ... here in this Psalm for example.  I can feel myself un-tensing as I release this anger to God who knows what to do with it, all of it (because I sure don't ... all I know to do is say ... here ... I'm sorry, I see anger is helping me to sin and btw ... fear is also helping me to sin.  Please forgive me.  Please help me with those two problems so that I don't go right back to the acting out sin stemming from those two sources (and while we are at it ... I'm willing to see other places as well ... those two I know about, but there are undoubtedly more.)  I am thankful the He may be found. 
And ... I am grateful for a hiding place.  That's a neat expression.  Sometimes I teasingly say I am hiding from my kids ... or, if you can't find me, I have probably moved to Alaska to hid out ... or ... in the airplane, it seems to be a place where none of my troubles can find me.  I am grateful that God says He will provide a hiding place and ... not only that but also preserve/deliver me from my troubles. Wow ... who wouldn't want that? 
It is so amazingly cool that God says "I" will instruct you and teach you what to do, where to go from here.  That's been one of my biggest concerns ... I just don't know what is best.  I am tangled up like a box of Chistmas lights, I can't tell one string from the other.  I have been learning about trust.  I do trust God.
mercy (amazing!) 
1 a :  compassion or forbearance shown especially to an offender or to one subject to one's power; also :  lenient or compassionate treatment mercy

b :  imprisonment rather than death imposed as penalty for first-degree murder
a :  a blessing that is an act of divine favor or compassion
b :  a fortunate circumstance mercy
 they found her before she froze>
:  compassionate treatment of those in distress mercy
 among the poor>

mercy like a quilt wraps around me ... it was fortunate, I have been freezing! 

11 Be glad in the Lord

and rejoice, ye righteous: 
and shout for joy, 
all ye that are upright in heart.

thankful that the work Of Jesus Christ has made forgiveness possible, grateful to be sheltered by HIS righteousness ... Isaiah 61:10 ...  delight greatly in the LORD; my soul rejoices in my God. For he has clothed me with garments of salvation and arrayed me in a robe of his righteousness, as a bridegroom adorns his head like a priest, and as a bride adorns herself with her jewels. (NIV)

I need to forgive as well as be forgiven ... He has that worked out as well. 

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