The way to love someone
is to lightly run your finger over that person's soul
until you find a crack,
and then gently pour your love into that crack.
~Keith Miller

Sunday, September 29, 2013


back together and refinished with something from the garage

for the living room
Pictures of my little $10 coffee table ... we took it apart and put it back together ... it's "curing", next a wax finish, buff ... came with a very nice piece of glass cut to set down into the frame of the top, and a curious little hole, countersink drill hole, perfect size for a locking washer I picked up out at the airport and set in there.

Today ... notes on what I've been happy to remember today:

A friend's dad has a dog "always in need of a bath" ... a companion, though stinky, his loyal friend.
I love that.

When I was very small my dad would sing a little thing ... my dog has fleas ... as he tuned his little guitar.  My dad liked to sing and brought the gift of music to our family. This isn't about that though I do dearly cherish that particular gift.
My dog has fleas ... he sang that with humor sparkling his baby blues.  My dad, well ... he was probably the coolest dad ever.  My dog has fleas (G,C,E,A) ... remember that he said and went on to say everyone, every single one of us, whether we can see 'em or not, has a dog with fleas ... and our flea ridden dogs are always in need of a bath.  My own little dog was actually named Stinky.
Every one of us has a dog with fleas.  Remember that.  
Yes, sir, I do.
Let sleeping dogs lie, just remember their fleas may not be napping ... .
Okay Daddy, I'll try to.

Later in life when some opportunity to judge a fellow traveler might present, my dad would simply raise his brows just slightly and quietly hum ... GCEA ... it was his way of saying we're all in this mess together and we all have dogs, companions, perhaps of our own selection, still, stinky dogs with fleas.
"Fleas hop from one dog to another, you know that right?"
"Choose your own dogs as carefully as you may, teach 'em manners, and learn to master them ... and be aware of the dogs of your companions," he'd say, "...but mostly know that dogs have fleas ... you gotta be careful of the insidiousness of fleas."

I laugh as I remember.  Gosh, it made perfect sense and still does to me.

My dad wasn't judgmental.  Guess I didn't even know much about that 'til I was older ... he was the 'til I walk a mile in their moccasins type of guy ... .  He was pretty awesome at extending the grace except where it came to keeping us safe ... well, and with politicians, who he was quite leery of.

I like that there was room in his way to allow people to be who they were and that he was so authentically, unabashedly, who he was ... that seems in short supply these days.

I miss him.

Saturday, September 28, 2013

“His words, soaring above his circumstances, set his troubles in a context large enough to contain them.”  Derek Kidner.

General characteristics
  • Crew: 1
  • Capacity: 1 passenger + 50 kg (110 lb) baggage
  • Length: 6.22 m (20 ft 5 in)
  • Wingspan: 8.50 m (27 ft 11 in)
  • Height: 2.15 m (7 ft 1 in)
  • Wing area: 9.94 m2 (107.0 sq ft)
  • Empty weight: 318 kg (701 lb)
  • Gross weight: 472.5 kg (1,042 lb)
  • Max takeoff weight: 600 kg (1,323 lb)
  • Fuel capacity: 126 l (28 imp gal), 120 l (26 imp gal) usable
  • Powerplant: 1 × Rotax 912S 4-cylinder, 4-stroke liquid/air-cooled engine, 75 kW (101 hp)
  • Maximum speed: 230 km/h (143 mph; 124 kn)
  • Cruising speed: 207 km/h (129 mph; 112 kn)
  • Stall speed: 65 km/h (40 mph; 35 kn)
  • Never exceed speed: 301 km/h (187 mph; 163 kn)
  • Range: 1,266 km (787 mi; 684 nmi)
  • Service ceiling: 4,572 m (15,000 ft)
  • Rate of climb: 4.9 m/s (960 ft/min)
  • Wing loading: 61 kg/m² (12 lb/sq ft)
  • Power/mass: 0.076 hp/lb (0.120 kW/kg)

Tuesday, September 24, 2013

quote seen (and snapped) from the Red Bull magazine at my dentist's office

close up view of a "signature", hers rather than his,
sewn (several passes) on to
the fabric for a one of a kind dress

as above ... from "Project Runway"
what a neat idea
(super sweet gift from the designer)
~ Justin LeBlanc

BMI chart

Monday, September 23, 2013

The IOS 7 ... I like it, I don't like the hassle of opening up enough space on the already overcrowded iPad, ForeFlight (which I absolutely like) is a space hog.  Already shopped the upgrade on a GPS able device and what can I say ... I'm saving up ... all other "treat" purchases are on hold.  Apple ... truly a love/hate sorta thing.  The mousepad on my Macbook is acting up and L thinks it may be "tired".  I will make the pilgrimage North to all things apple-ious and let the gurus prognosticate.

In the meanwhile ... today ... Two has so very graciously loaned her wifi mouse to ease my project along.  Today ... I want to drop those notes previously stored on my iPad in here on my blog/journal.
So ... with the note that there is little sense to the following other then I noted it as a point of interest I proceed with my C/P endeavor:

"A man full of faith is simply one who has lost (or never had) the capacity for clear and realistic thought.He is not a mere ass; he is actually ill.Worse, he is incurable." - H.L.Mencken 
I think that the verses you note have too much prominence in the minds of individuals with faith in God, and I positively think that those verses, as popularly understood and bandied about, do not honor the truth of verses such as Genesis 2:23-24, Matthew 19:6.  Is a helpmate simply an individual who submits, or, is a helpmate an individual who is a mate, and helps just as equally as the other helpmate?  Is not the joining of man and woman together in marriage, under the eyes of God, a combining of two helpmates into one, and thus an increase in their mutual ability to help, i.e. become greater?  "Where two or three are gathered together, there I AM also."

"We're conceived in irony. We float in it from the womb. It's the amniotic fluid. It's the silver sea. It's the waters at their priest-like task, washing away guilt and purpose and responsibility. Joking but not joking. Caring but not caring. Serious but not serious."
(Hilary in The Old Country by Alan Bennett, 1977)


When you come to me, unbidden,
Beckoning me
To long-ago rooms,
Where memories lie.

Offering me, as to a child, an attic,
Gatherings of days too few.
Baubles of stolen kisses.
Trinkets of borrowed loves.
Trunks of secret words,


-Maya Angelou

Loneliness is the day after forever . . . the waking moments after a dream . . . memories forgotten until the midnight hour.
via The King of Texas - and there attributed to - Nat Lamb THE PIED TYPER

"A few strong instincts and a few plain rules suffice us.’ ~ Ralph Waldo Emerson

We must learn to regard people less in the light of what they do or omit to do, and more in the light of what they suffer.”
― Dietrich Bonhoeffer

“Judging others makes us blind, whereas love is illuminating. By judging others we blind ourselves to our own evil and to the grace which others are just as entitled to as we are.”
― Dietrich Bonhoeffer, The Cost of Discipleship

“There is meaning in every journey that is unknown to the traveler.”

“I'm still discovering, right up to this moment, that it is only by living completely in this world that one learns to have faith. I mean living unreservedly in life's duties, problems, successes and failures, experiences and perplexities. In so doing, we throw ourselves completely into the arms of God.”
― Dietrich Bonhoeffer

“There is nothing that can replace the absence of someone dear to us, and one should not even attempt to do so. One must simply hold out and endure it. At first that sounds very hard, but at the same time it is also a great comfort. For to the extent the emptiness truly remains unfilled one remains connected to the other person through it. It is wrong to say that God fills the emptiness. God in no way fills it but much more leaves it precisely unfilled and thus helps us preserve -- even in pain -- the authentic relationship. Further more, the more beautiful and full the remembrances, the more difficult the separation. But gratitude transforms the torment of memory into silent joy. One bears what was lovely in the past not as a thorn but as a precious gift deep within, a hidden treasure of which one can always be certain.”


The wonder of a miracle from which this love began. There is so much found in the touch of holding a grandchild's hand." Unknown
Gladys Aylward

"... if God has called you to China or any other place and you are sure in your own heart, let nothing deter you... remember it is God who has called you and it is the same as when He called Moses or Samuel."

"I wasn't God's first choice for what I've done for China, I don't know who it was.  It must have been a man, well-educated man.  I don't know what happened.  Perhaps he died.  Perhaps he wasn't willing, and God looked down and saw Gladys Aylward and God said - "Well, she's willing."

"I wasn't God's first choice for what I've done for China, I don't know who it was

171. Tahhieal trail

My religion consists of a humble admiration of the illimitable superior spirit who reveals himself in the slight details we are able to perceive with our frail and feeble mind. ~ Albert Einstein

Everything is determined by forces over which we have no control. It is determined for the insect as well as for the star. Human beings, vegetables, or cosmic dust - we all dance to a mysterious tune, intoned in the distance by an invisible piper.
What your heart thinks is great, is great.

The soul's emphasis is always right.

The end of the human race will be that it will eventually die of civilization.

It is one of the most beautiful compensations of this life that no man can sincerely try to help another without helping himself.

Ralph Waldo Emerson, U.S. Poet, essayist and transcendentalist (1803-1882)



"Each ten years of a man's life has its own fortunes, its own hopes, its own desires."
~ Goethe
How old would you be if you didn't know how old you are?
Satchel Paige

Deep calleth unto deep at the noise of thy waterspouts: all thy waves and thy billows are gone over me. 8 Yet the LORD will command his lovingkindness in the daytime, and in the night his song shall be with me, 42psalms7&8

(C tin boom the hiding place. )

– physical activity, social interaction, emotional engagement with others – as a way of helping to facilitate positive coping and increase physical and mental well-being.


Proverbs 3:5 Trust in the LORD with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding.I

I hear jet engines here and there their sound disperses ricochets  about on the thick overcast layer
Now the steady pat of a jogger groaning as the terrain shifts slightly down hill which mile does he pass


12 Hope deferred maketh the heart sick: proverbs 13:12
Ps 16 ... 6 By mercy and truth iniquity is purged: and by the fear of the LORD men depart from evil.
And when he took the scroll, the four living beings and the twenty-four elders fell down before the Lamb. Each one had a harp, and they held gold bowls filled with incense, which are the prayers of God's people. Rev 5:
(Love those prayer bowls)
Eros enters him like an invader, taking over and reorganising, one by one, the institutions of a conquered country. It may have taken over many others before it reaches the sex in him; and it will reorganise that too86
The reader will notice that Eros thus wonderfully transforms what is par excellence a Need-pleasure into the most Appreciative of all pleasures. It is the nature of a Needpleasure to show us the object solely in relation to our need, even our momentary need. But in Eros, a Need, at its most intense, sees the object most intensely as a thing admirable in herself, important far beyond her relation to the lover's need.87
If we had not all experienced this, if we were mere logicians, we might boggle at the conception of desiring a human being, as distinct from desiring any pleasure, comfort, or service that human being can give87
Without Eros sexual desire, like every other desire, is a fact about ourselves. Within Eros it is rather about the Beloved. 87
17 How precious also are thy thoughts unto me, O God! how great is the sum of them! 18 If I should count them, they are more in number than the sand: when I awake, I am still with thee.  Ps139
(w/ those super cool micro sand images)
"The Wind That Blows"
The wind that blows quiet knows
A song as soft as silence goes
Into each thread a secret said
The sun and moon on a wedding bed

A rope unbound a treasure found
A healing ground an island drowned
To be without and not belong
Between the right and the wrong

And I won't seek nor will I find
Today is here then gone behind

The future makes the past opaque
I've given all for true love's sake
The tolling chime the senseless mime
The whirling hand of the beast of time

And what of this for a traitor's kiss
And what of now for a beggar's bliss
To fall away and leave the fray
To disappear and lose the way

And I won't seek nor will I find
Today is here then gone behind

The lost ones and the lonely
Are the ones that go before their time is done
And the broken and the helpless
Are the ones that leave but never ever come

I'm not ashamed to be unnamed
And unmarked box left unclaimed
To be without and not belong
Between the right and the wrong

And I won't seek nor will I find
Today is here then gone behind

~Piers Faccini

In one corner lay a little heap of withered rose-leaves,whose long-lived scent had long since departed; and, in another, a small packet of papers, tied with a bit of ribbon, whose color had gone with the rose-scent.
180ct12 (written by Lewis' guy whose name I don't recall just now)
Saturn  lightening up the SE sky.  Inbound .... Rising looks like inbound traffic approaching low and slow
The fuzz of early morning golden nudging back the black ahead the grey gives way to clear blue skies ... 28F ... Smooth sailing over ATL ...
Moving East through the terminator line towards the second cup of morning coffee
VO5 hairspray fumes burning my still tired eyes (I remember those words are about L's mother)

Moving in line ... Aligned ... Yet not connected   I wonder how ants know ... Who wonders how we know and ... Do we know?    Transporting our young and or old to the one point where they will board separately and go their own ways ... Away from this last time together ... I think I know that.

All violence consists in some people forcing others, under threat of suffering or death, to do what they do not want to do. Tolstoy
Violent, forceful, coersive (black and white of it) ~D

The most beautiful thing we can experience is the mysterious. It is the source of all true art and all science. He to whom this emotion is a stranger, who can no longer pause to wonder and stand rapt in awe, is as good as dead: his eyes are closed.

-Albert Einstein
So that's why we chose "Icarus," but besides that we have a clever way of seeing the Icarus myth, which brushes away some of the inhibitions people have. Because we hear it a lot, that we picked the wrong name, that "hey isn't this the guy who tried to fly with his father's wax wings and fell into the ocean." But that was a myth, a myth from 2,500 years ago, and like many myths it's flexible, especially in a time like ours when we have Hollywood and CGI, which are tools that allow you to reshape a myth. In our version, Icarus falling into the ocean wasn't the final chapter. We believe that he washed up on a beautiful deserted island, and he looked for his father in the sky and didn't see him. So he started a fire on the beach, and tried to think about how he might get back to the sky. And at that moment he looked toward the sky and he saw his destiny, and his destiny was to forge new wings of steel and fire so that he could try again. And he wouldn't repeat the mistakes of his father, who after all had fashioned the original wax wings. He would improve on his father's design. 

"At every crossway on the road that leads to the future...each progressive spirit is opposed by...a thousand men appointed to guard the past." -- Maurice Maeterlinck
"Man must rise above the Earth -- to the top of the atmosphere and beyond -- for only thus will he fully understand the world in which he lives." -- Socrates
Perhaps I did not change the world. Perhaps there is still injustice in the world. But there will be a child who will live because men left the security they enjoyed in their home country to come to his. And this child will learn in the new schools that have been built. He will walk his streets not worried about whether or not his leader’s henchmen are going to come and kidnap him. He will grow into a fine man who will pursue every opportunity his heart could desire. He will have the gift of freedom, which I have enjoyed for so long. If my life buys the safety of a child who will one day change this world, then I know that it was all worth it.—-Sgt. William Stacey as written in a letter that was given to his family after he died from an IED in Afghanistan

Well, I love it.
Love that ground speed tending to blur "the" landing process ... An hour ahead and a few clear thoughts behind.
Love that inside two weeks your little French  girl can get the co-pilot fluent in French ... Uh, flyin' French that is.
Love the mythical Captain voice soothing in the cabin, smoothing up front ... and that you can do that even as you squirm ... impressive.
What I really love is at what point in the learning experience and how you finessed this out of the proverbial hand basket before the plane's enhanced high gloss feathers were rippled.  "Yes ... now."  Too funny.

20 Ways to Feel ALIVE!!!!!!
Unless you are the second coming of Jesus Christ (if you are, please comment!) it’s impossible not to feel a bit down sometimes. Here are 20 quick ways to revive yourself and get back that “on top of the world” feeling.

Stick your body out of a sunroof while the car is driving
I can tell you first-hand this one is a lot of fun. If you don’t have a sunroof, a window works just as well. Speeds of 40 mph+ make the experience much more invigorating.
Go experience nature
Being outside just feels right.
Destroy something
Take out some frustrations on an inanimate object like the printer in ‘Office Space’
Remember that one time you got a bit tipsy and ACTUALLY danced and didn’t care about everyone watching? Go do that again (being tipsy is optional).
Realize that you are ALIVE!
You have years and years of potential ahead of you. If you feel dead today, consider what stupendous things you could be doing tomorrow.
Hormones are the best legal drugs out there. Pump some iron or go for a run and get that adrenaline pumping.
Watch the sun rise
You can’t argue with this one. Wake up a bit early and remind yourself how refreshing this experience can be.
Scare yourself
Are you deathly afraid of spiders? Go touch one. Pick a fear and go check and see if it still freaks you out ;)
Run around in the rain
Haven’t you seen ‘Singing in the Rain’ or ‘The Sound of Music?’
Blast your favorite badass song
My favorites are Bliss by Muse, You and Whose Army? by Radiohead and Without a Face by Rage Against the Machine.
Do something outside of your comfort zone
Surely you can find something in this last but I wanted to keep your imagination going just in case.
Scream at the top of your lungs
Like in all of those cliche movies where they yell in the rain on top of some mountain… except do in right where you are, right now.
Google “meditation techniques” if you’re unsure of the best way to do this.
Do something spontaneous
It doesn’t have to be crazy or dangerous, just fine. Stepping outside your normal schedule and throwing responsibility to the wind feels great.
Practice an act of random kindness
Giving feels really good. Sometimes we forget exactly how good.
Get to know a stranger
Truly connect with another human being. Skip the small talk and ask about their goals and ambitions.
Make love and/or have an outrageous make-out session
The room/closet/dressing room you occupy should be FILLED with steam afterward or you’re not rocking it hard enough.
Do something illegal
Oh my gosh, did I just tell you to break the law? Hell yes I did. Laws are made to be broken and it feels great to do it.
Drive fast…really fast
Think ‘The Fast & The Furious: Tokyo Drift.’ If you have a Prius, maybe you should just skip to the next one…
Get Mad!
Anger is a gift. If something is getting you down, express your frustration about it! Just getting your feeling out can feel amazing.
Bonus Reader-Suggested Ways
Swim in a cold lake, beach or river
I never feel more alive than when I get out after a cold swim and my heart is pumping to keep my body warm. A cold shower is good too. I believe the word is: invigorating. — Elkano
Attend a funeral
It’s been said that nothing makes you feel more alive than death. — Ace
How Do You Make That Feeling Permanent?
Step 1: Figure out what it is that makes you feel dead and cut it out of your life.
Step 2: Find your bliss and go after it with every fiber of your being.

About Jordan Lejuwaan
Hey, I'm the creator of HighExistence. I love inspiring others to follow their bliss, which in turn fulfills my own. I live for traveling, late-night conversations and moments of intense clarity or intoxication.

100 cool ideas

1. True wisdom and insight is always free.
2. Give your power over to no one.
3. Going into the unknown is how you expand what is known.
4. Get a library card.
5. Spend more time around people that both challenge and respect you.
6. Remain skeptical forever.
7. Fight for what matters.
8. There is a method that works. Find it.
9. Join a movement.
10. Drink your coffee black.
11. Never let anyone photoshop a picture of you. It creates a false sense of self-confidence.
12. Read more. Especially things you disagree with.
13. Get used to feeling stupid. It’s a sign of growth.
14. It’s easy for people to talk a good game, so watch how they behave instead.
15. Learn something from everyone.
16. Find things that inspire you and pursue them, even if there’s no money in it.
17. Starve if you have to, for as long as you need to.
18. Survive on a little just to prove you can do it.
19. Get one big success at an early age. It’ll help build your confidence for bigger things.
20. Do what you say you’ll do. No one is reliable anymore.
21. Be comfortable with abandonment, even of parts of your identity.
22. Learn a new language.
23. Eat more protein.
24. Keep people around you that will tell you the truth.
25. Genius gets you nowhere. Execution is everything.
26. If given the choice of equity or cash, always take cash.
27. Meet new people as often as possible. Offer to help them.
28. Don’t discriminate. Connect anyone in your network to anyone else.
29. If you can’t do a pull-up, you have a problem.
30. Nobody likes a know-it-all.
31. Get a passport. Fill it up with stamps no one has ever seen.
32. Quit your horrible job.
33. Read biographies. It’s like having access to the best mentors in history.
34. Go to bed, and wake up, early. No one will bother you, letting your best work emerge.
35. Scare yourself a little bit every day. It will expand your inner map.
36. Learn to climb trees.
37. Don’t buy a lot of stuff, and only buy the stuff you really love.
38. Be humble and curious.
39. Twitter followers don’t keep you warm at night.
40. Be as useful as you can in as many circumstances as possible.
41. Show up.
42. Repeat people’s names when you meet them.
43. Turn internet access off your phone. Wifi is fine.
44. Get a deck of Oblique Strategies cards. Use them.
45. Make your home a place where you feel safe.
46. Take people up on bets. Make more bets yourself.
47. Take cold showers. They’re better than coffee.
48. Learn to enjoy hunger.
49. Make everything either shorter, or longer, than it needs to be.
50. Always remember those who helped you. Deliver two or three times as much value back.
51. But also, help people who have never helped you, and can’t.
52. When you know that pain is temporary, it affects all of your decisions.
53. Get a tattoo. Don’t worry about regret.
54. Commit to things, regularly, that are far beyond your ability.
55. Meet with friends more often than you think you have to.
56. Learn to meditate. Go on a retreat if you have to.
57. Your stories are both more and less interesting than you think.
58. Learn to really listen.
59. Walk more.
60. Ugly is just a step on the way to beautiful.
61. Get to know your neighbours.
62. Don’t take anything personally, ever.
63. Consider avoiding school. Go to lots of conferences instead.
64. As soon as you can, buy some art.
65. Apologize more than you need to.
66. Find out if there will be food there.
67. A good haircut changes everything.
68. Read Man’s Search For Meaning.
69. Say no to projects you don’t care about.
70. Do things that are uncool. Later on, they usually end up becoming cool anyway.
71. Find your voice.
72. Have some manners.
73. Learn to play chess, go, and bridge. They’ll keep you from going senile.
74. Learn about the Tetrapharmakos.
75. Find ways to cheat the system– just don’t cheat people.
76. Be like Jesus, not like his followers. (This applies to all of them.)
77. At least once, date someone that’s out of your league.
78. Examine your jealousy. You’ll learn a lot about yourself.
79. Good connections are about people, not social networks.
80. Address small problems. They will become big problems.
81. Dress like a cooler version of yourself.
82. Yes, there is such a thing as bad press.
83. Add “adventurer” to your Twitter bio. Then, become one.
84. If the internet is the best thing in your life, you have a serious problem.
85. Give away your best work for free.
86. Find mentors. Just don’t call them that.
87. Actually write on your blog. Nobody cares if it’s hard.
88. Download Freedom. Use it for an hour every day.
89. Join a gym. Lift the heaviest you can. (This applies to girls too.)
90. Do some freewriting. It helps you think things through.
91. When you’re having supper with rich people, pick up the cheque.
92. Learn how to speak in public.
93. If you see someone who needs help, stop asking yourself if they need help. Instead, just help.
94. Bring a bottle of wine.
95. The best conversations are had side by side, not one in front of the other.
96. Protect your hearing. Trust me.
97. Do what’s most important first thing in the morning, before you check email.
98. Everyone feels like they’re not good enough. It’s not just you.
99. Courage is a learned skill.
100. Go to Iceland. It’s worth it.

Julien Smith

Talking of copilots - you may or may not of seen this poem before, its by Keith Murray (a pilot - google for more info) and was written in 1941:

I am the co-pilot, I sit on the right,
It’s up to me to be quick and bright;
I never talk back for I have regrets,
But I have to remember what the Captain forgets.

I make out the flight plan and study the weather,
Pull up the gear, stand by to feather;
Make out the mail forms and do the reporting;
And fly the old crate while the Captain is courting.

I take the readings, adjust the power,
Put on the heaters when we’re in a shower;
Tell him where we are on the darkest of night,
And do all the bookwork without any light.

I call for my Captain and buy him cokes;
I always laugh at his corney jokes;
And once in a while when his landings are rusty,
I always come through with, "By gosh it’s gusty".

All in all I’m a general stooge,
As I sit on the right of the man I call "Scrooge";
I guess you think this is past understanding,
But maybe some day he will give me a landing.

via FL390 comment from UK Dave

Star Bright is a charm quilt where fabrics are only used one time in the quilt. There are 1624 different fabrics in this quilt top.

Finland. This hotel offers rooms that are thermal igloos made of glass so you can view the Northern Lights.

Psalm 73: 25&26~> (25) Whom have I in heaven but thee?  and there is none upon earth that I desire beside thee. (26) My flesh and my heart faileth: but God is the strength of my heart, and my portion for ever.

“The most important human endeavor is striving for morality in our actions. Our inner balance and even our very existence depend on it. Only morality in our actions can give beauty and dignity to our lives.”
Albert Einstein (1879-1955);
Theoretical Physicist, Philosopher, Nobel Prize Winner

“Physical bravery is an animal instinct; moral bravery is much higher and truer courage.”
Wendell Phillips (1811-1884);
Slavery Abolitionist

"Lake|Flato's architecture can serve as a lesson for us all: how a building stands to the sun, how it welcomes the cooling breeze, how it partners with plant materials.  Nothing sensational or exotic, no visual fireworks of fashion, just architecture that intrigues the mind, delights the soul, and refreshes the eye with its elegant detail and simplicity.  timeless architecture needn't shout ..." ~ William Turnbull, FAIA
"I will bless the LORD at all times; his praise shall continually be in my mouth."

Psalm 34:1

Out of suffering have emerged the strongest souls; the most massive characters are seared with scars.

Kahlil Gibran (1883 - 1931)

If he is indeed wise he does not bid you enter the house of his wisdom, but rather leads you to the threshold of your own mind.

Much of your pain is self-chosen. It is the bitter potion by which the physician within you heals your sick self. Therefore trust the physician, and drink his remedy in silence and tranquility: For this hand, though heavy and hard, is guided by the tender hand of the Unseen...q

"Oh, I have slipped the surly bonds of earth,
And danced the skies on laughter-silvered wings;
Sunward I've climbed and joined the tumbling mirth of sun-split clouds -
and done a hundred things You have not dreamed of -
wheeled and soared and swung high in the sunlit silence.
Hovering there I've chased the shouting wind along
and flung my eager craft through footless halls of air.
"Up, up the long delirious burning blue
I've topped the wind-swept heights with easy grace,
where never lark, or even eagle, flew;
and, while with silent, lifting mind I've trod
the high untrespassed sanctity of space,
put out my hand and touched the face of God."

High Flight
By John Gillespie Magee, Jr.
(A sonnet written by John Gillespie Magee, an American pilot with the Royal Canadian Air Force in the Second World War. He came to Britain, flew in a Spitfire squadron, and was killed at the age of nineteen on 11 December 1941 during a training flight from the airfield near Scopwick.)

Portions Of This Lovely Poem Appear On The Headstones
Of Many Interred In Arlington National Cemetery,
Patricularly Aviators And Astronauts

The tzitzit first appear on Numbers 15 when God says to Moses, "Throughout the generations to come you are to make tassels on the corners of your garments, with a blue cord in each tassel. You will have these tassels to look at and so you will remember all the commands of the Lord, that you may obey them and not prostitute yourselves by chasing after the lusts of your own hearts and eyes. then you will remember to obey all my commands."

God tells his people to attach tassels to the corners of their garments so they will be constantly visually reminded to live as he created them to live.

The word in Hebrew here for "corners" is kanaf.

The word for tassel (or fringe) is tzitzit.

To this day, many Jews wear a prayer shawl to obey this text.  The prayer shawl is also in a lot of interesting places throughout the Bible.  One of the most significant is in the prophet Malachi's prediction about the coming Messiah:  The sun of righteousness will rise with healing in its wings. (4:2)

The word Malachi uses for wings is "kanuf" - the same word in Numbers which refers to the edge of a garment, to which the tassels were attached.  So a legend grew that when the Messiah came there would be special healing powers in his kanuf,  in the tassels of his prayer shawl.

Fast forward to the time of Jesus: A woman has had an illness for twelve years and no one can cure her. She pushes her way through a crowd to get to Jesus, and when she gets close to him she grabs his cloak. Now remember Jesus is a Torah-observant Jewish rabbi who keeps the Scripture commandments word for word, including passages like Numbers 15, which means Jesus would have been wearing a prayer shawl. So when the woman grabs the edge of his cloak she is demonstrating that she believes that Jesus is the Messiah, and that his tassels have healing powers.  She believes that Jesus is who Malachi is talking about.

If you were in the crowd, what would you think about this woman?  This woman believes that this man is the Messiah.

She touches his tassels and is healed just like Malachi said.

But I don't think the physical healing is Jesus' point here.  I think it is what Jesus says to her when they part ways.

He says to her "Go in peace."

The word Jesus would have used is the Hebrew word shalom.
Shalom is an important word in the Bible, and it is not completely accurate to translate it simply as "peace."

For many of us, we understand peace to be the absence of conflict. We talk about peace in the home or in the world or giving peace a chance. But the Hebraic understanding of shalom is far more the absence of conflict or strife.

Shalom is the presence of the goodness of God. It is the presence of wholeness, completeness.

So when Jesus tells the woman to go in peace, he is placing the blessing of God on all of her. Not just her physical body.  He is blessing her with God's presence on her entire being. And this is because for Jesus, salvation is holistic in nature. For Jesus, being saved or reconciled to God involves far more the the saving of your physical body or your soul - it involves all of you.

God's desire is for us to live in harmony with him - body, soul, spirit, mind, emotions - every inch of our being.

We make out of the quarrel with others, rhetoric, but of the quarrel with ourselves, poetry—“Anima Hominis,” Essays (1924). Yeats
Rama logos

Logos objective thrush of God. Truth eternal truth

Rama is when God taps you on the should and says hey I'm talking to you

When you are awaken to a "truth"/Rama

All have sinned and fallen short of the glory ... All sinners ... Sin buddies ... When the Bible says all its to make sure you know God is talking about you ... It means I have sinned it means you have sinned bc until you realize you have sinned you don't really need a savior.

Four elements of worship

I urge you there fore (this words references everything which has been written in light of everything all 11 chapters ... I urge you to present your bodies a living and holy sacrifice.  You cannot accidentally worship God ... It is a conscious choice ... You concede your willingness
To sacrifice ... Sacrifice is a very big word and it is associated with sin ...

We are the creation/Ed that is specifically designed to worship God ... Something mysterious there ...
Falling short of Gods GLORY

Honor glorified ...
Sin is failing to be positioned where we may experience God's glory.

Those things in our lives that compete with us paying attention to God ... Are idols. In place of the time you should be spending w God.

Die to those things and the stuff God likes He will resurrect.

When I want what God wants I'll get what I want.
God can change desires
God can change hearts.

If you heard him and didn't obey Him you didn't worship him
Ask Him to speak to you
If any man lacks wisdom let him ask of God


Cranberry Fluff
Ground fresh cranberries marinated in OJ and sugar over night)
Halved green grapes
Fuji apple - chopped (Use fresh slice to garnish)
baby sized marshmallows
whipped cream

Cinnamon raisin bread toast or muffins?  Lemon poppy seed muffins maybe.
Starbucks bottled coffee for the girls
Apple juice
coffee for me goes w/o saying ...


butternut squash/ pumpkin cream soup with bacon crisps
caramelized onion goat cheese tartlets
shrimp shooters

sage/onion cornbread dressing
thyme roasted new potatoes (Parmesan)
sweet potato salad, roasted garlic, toasted pumpkin seeds, with apple cider vinaigrette (Dried fuji slice to garnish)

Rustic (perfect for my baking skills! lol) Apple cinnamon tart with   cider ice cream
chocolate brownie/ amaretto cream

  “Climb the mountains and get their good tidings. Nature's peace will flow into you as sunshine flows into trees. The winds will blow their own freshness into you, and the storms their energy, while cares will drop off like autumn leaves.”

     “Most people are on the world, not in it - having no conscious sympathy or relationship to anything about them - undiffused, separate, and rigidly alone like marbles of polished stone, touching but separate”

We all flow from one fountain Soul. All are expressions of one Love. God does not appear, and flow out, only from narrow chinks and round bored wells here and there in favored races and places, but He flows in grand undivided currents, shoreless and boundless over creeds and forms and all kinds of civilizations and peoples and beasts, saturating all and fountainizing all.
John Muir, Badè's Life and Letters of John Muir: June 9, 1872 letter to Miss Catharine Merrill, from New Sentinel Hotel, Yosemite Valley
US (Scottish-born) conservationist & naturalist (1838 - 1914)

James 3:17-18
Real wisdom, God's wisdom, begins with a holy life and is characterized by getting along with others.  It is gentle and reasonable, overflowing with mercy and blessings, not hot one day and cold the next, not two- faced.  You can develop a healthy, robust community that lives right with God and enjoy its results only if you do the hard work of getting along with each other, treating each other with dignity and honor.

Toxic relationships
Toxic habits ... Diminishing satisfaction


Friday, September 20, 2013

Rotax engine
why two carburetors?

light sport ... something new for me

Sport flying ... This was the check out flight ... over the lake (life is good).  Plans to fly most of today.  The plane is tiny, 1350 max gross and not only does it "feel" lighter and fly lighter, the control inputs are significantly different from what I'm used to.  The light sport is a different kind of bird.  A (sales) company has contracted with me to provide, uh, joyrides (and I say that with all sincerity, these little babies are joy makers to be sure) and instruction to those fortunate enough to purchase a piece of the dream.
... more on this later ...

Tuesday, September 17, 2013

two coats of Annie Sloan's Greek Blue + clear wax + dark wax
It's good ... the smell of the paint reminds me of Burt's Bees Baby products, which is nice.  I'm looking at this in the room where I intend it to be and it's a tad dark for me.  I'm thinking to "wash" the dark wax back with mineral spirits, I think I preferred the shade before the dark wax went on ... and I may need to mix the blue with the old white for a light periwinkle ... there's a color in mind and I know it's in those cans!  Or the seat cushion may be just the thing ... .

Monday, September 16, 2013

(like that ... there is a big heavy chunk of aerodynamically shaped metal, too tiny to see, right there @FLodd
... how did that happen?, and how did I notice it? ... and the plane is the smallest "miraculous" pictured here)

Trust ... from 8/11

I think about this little dream, or rather those two dreams from time to time ... especially on Sunday when the sermon leans me towards choosing to trust God.  Wow ... that is such a huge task it seems to me ... trust in something unseen ... leaning in towards an invisible.

We are reading through (and discussing) I Samuel in Sunday school.  David, at least the young David, rocked "trust".

I have experienced something very cool ... it's hard to put in to words without sounding like a complete loon ... and sounding looney is really not something I like very much (even though I admire and actually "believe" other peoples incredible tales ... I believe that the inexplicable actually happens, and in fact wants/wishes to happen more often then we bits of dust and whisps of spirit will allow).  And, I may be trying to hear/tell the story of that, but the bottom line is; I feel good about trust in relation to God and something about that helps me feel safe ... and maybe even safe about love.  And love is such a big deal to God.

I'm thinking about it.

This post was actually noted back in maybe Aug. '11 ... it goes with some stuff I'm trying to think about now.  So ... it seems random, but it's really just out of order.  And ... I'm past the brick wall of it now.
Just quick - because I am drawing a beautiful graphic of a prop gov with the prop hub etc - I talked to my brother about this little jewel this morning and the man is a freakin' genius. He gets mechanical.

That weird dream - the loop dream - is similar to that slam on the breaks and jump out of the truck dream. I don't know why I am having that genre of dream but I am glad I noted it because I would have forgotten it otherwise. It seems to be about being abandoned. I haven't felt helpless in either dream - just confused and unable. And sad kinda. The anxiety in those dreams comes from not understanding what is going on. Maybe it's about unknowns. Idk.

I'm still thinking about it and I know I may get in the plane with a person who I didn't know well personally, but I would definitely not be a passenger in a truck or car with someone I didn't trust explicitly. I don't prefer to ride with people unless I really know them. I wouldn't even sit in a vehicle with someone I didn't have a high level of trust in.

I think the person in these dreams may represent something other than a person. I mean like a force - like an idea or a perception or maybe a goal. Maybe the driver or pilot is the rating I am trying to accomplish and it seems to be an unpredictable sometimes un attainable goal. I still don't know.

Quick Honey-balsamic Salmon recipe

Salmon with a honey-balsamic glaze, aka today's lunch

L comes home for lunch practically everyday.  If I'm home I cook, if not he eats a pj sandwich or sardines and crackers.  Today we walked in the front door together and I had no idea what to prep for lunch.  This was super easy ... delicious and fast.

Frozen salmon fillet - I began steaming two of these in a heavy skillet with a lid.
Next, the glaze:
1/4 c balsamic vinegar
2 big spoonfuls of local honey
2 big cloves of garlic finely grated
a chicken bouillon cube and a bit of water, maybe a couple tablespoons
would have used a shot of Dijon mustard, but I'm out ... on the list (there's a fresh loaf of rye bread on the countertop to remind me!)
put everything together in sauce pan to boil ... flipped fish ... chopped lettuce, red onion and an avocado, then poured bubbling glaze over fish while it was still in the skillet and turned fire off  ... plated Salmon and poured glaze over everything ... done.

Fitness pal computes the calorie count on that to be 425 per serving ...
4oz salmon = 130
2Tbsp honey = 128 (there may have been less - I didn't measure it well)
1/2 avocado = 114

may have been a tad too sweet, but very filling ... !

Sunday, September 15, 2013

past week from my phone images ... no time to write really

plant shopping
nursery structure feels like a home

a reminder
.7 wore the student flat out
also that some folks really do need a footstool
and that's ok

red sky at night

B3's bat

black jeans
and someone's new gig
(IKEA frames)
(jeans not American made ... )


it's a bird, it's a plane ... no it's Superman
(or contrails and ice)

more planes

new project supplies

made in China
nothing is made here anymore
I remember when my parents would put it back on the shelf
if it didn't have  the USA flag  indicating point of origin
I  am very troubled that we don't make stuff
this is a scale
my new scale

second coat on
tomorrow the wax
think I'm going to like it
the paint actually smells good
(made in England)
and Stella

Sunday, September 8, 2013

Receptionist at haircutting place said, "I didn't even recognize you (from yesterday when I dropped by before workout with Four for a spontaneous haircut for her) when you came in for your appointment today" ... haircut lady said "DeAnn comes in only once a year for a real haircut though she has her bangs trimmed more frequently". I thought she was wrong ... surely I was in around Christmas ... . Nope.  I noted it here, it was last September.  I guess I treat myself after the summer. I go in and relax in the chair and she tells me about something I've never heard about, like waxing in Atlanta, or the best little hole in the wall eating joint in New Orleans. "So, what are we doing today?" she asked like I might have some new found interest in my "style".  She is noted to be the best colorist in town and sometimes we talk about adding grey, or white, making my hair look like Emmy Lou Harris' hair.  I feel like it should be all grey, or white, by now, but it isn't and I'm not one to "keep up" with the roots.  It would be a real mess within the month.  I'm too old to think of roots showing and bra straps showing as anything but just tacky.  "Ummm,  just make it look right'" I say, "I'm trying to avoid that biker babe stringy look ... cut off how ever much it takes."  She notices that my hair is about one third as thick as it used to be, she's been cutting it for a long time, and I say thanks for telling me to keep one of my ponytails when I used to have them cut off and sent away to Locks of Love.  I'm noticing that it doesn't take very long to blow dry, and I'm glad about that ... and I wonder why I kept that ponytail when I know I'd never take the time to "plug it in" for extra fullness.  I think I started out with enough hair to lose half of it to menopause and the rest of it to general, free floating stress that comes with the climb to the top of the hill.  I need to look "nice" just every once in awhile ... most of the time it's okay to look just like me.  I just don't want to mess with it.  We tailgated this weekend, and I was looking forward to it ... tailgating in the rarefied air of an air conditioned tent ... it did turn out to be a peek at everything I don't like about "here" ... except the sweet tea which was practically a necessity after the walk through the crowds partying up before the game.  I heard a song, new to me, which I will try to find now ...

yep, that's it

So ... here it is, Monday morning, my house was empty by 7:00 ... an hours worth of yard work chittychat, breakfast dishes on the counter top ... a stack of words representing old news/same ole same ole and a cup of cold coffee down on the end of the dining room table.  I step outside to move the bird feeder and bring an orchid back in with me, it needs water and a spot in the house.  The sun is hiding behind a layer that will probably become an afternoon shower and I wonder how many yards the guys working this neighborhood will get mowed before it gets  too wet to work. And ... I think about planning out my week. Last week I spent my "spending money" on some Sam Edelman flats, cantaloupe and cinnamon with a gold metal toe ... perfect for the party ... now I need to start saving up to waste it, the money I get from wasting my time working for others because I don't know what better to do, to waste it on a little shopping trip.  Except for a pair of black pants (and maybe those Coach booties, I say that tongue in cheek) I have everything I need and more.

Today I'll stay home
and wash the windows on the front of the house
and maybe in the den
I'll vacuum and steam the wood floors in my house and the kitchen too
and I'll hang that load of white towels outside and maybe they'll dry before it rains today, but they will at least fill themselves with the good smell of the pine forest that is my backyard
and I'll get the sheets to going
and I should dust
there's dust on the lamps in the living room
it's there again
like the stack of newspapers ... not news ... same ole same ole
and the bathrooms ... the bathrooms definitely want to be cleaned

I'll figure out the just right salad for the mother-daughter dinner coming up tonight while I brush my thinning hair up into a ponytail

and think about which of my Pandora stations would be best for a day like this one ... something loud to beat back the silence I think.

A smile is the chosen vehicle of all ambiguities.
~ Herman Melville

Tuesday, September 3, 2013

Blue Bird

Notes from Samuel ... coming up.
Bottom line in chapter 15 ... Saul decided it would be better, more fun maybe, more what he wanted in service to his own particular desires, to keep the king alive as a token of his triumph over the Amalekites (a "type" for sin). The directions were clear even though I can't imagine they would be easy to follow, so, I see that side of the story, but the end result was Saul decided that he knew better then God.  And his knowing better, saving just a smidge of the sin, lead to actions with consequences.  I wonder, if it's possible to step away from the story and just think about it as a tale about choices and where they take one, I wonder if it's really even possible to eradicate "a sin" from one's doings.
It seems like I just really have a lot of excellent reasons for scaling the sin back to something which seems manageable, or acceptable to  ... me.
And then later in the chapter the idea of obedience is better then sacrifice is presented.  I'm thinking about the ultimate consequence of the first disobedience being that one supremely significant sacrifice.  I'm also thinking about how truly difficult it is to turn away from the things that we think may help the bluebird perch on our shoulder ... however briefly.
From reading I Sam. 15 I see a person who wanted to feel better ... and he made some choices to support that, disobedient choices.  It's almost funny to see him rationalizing, shifting blame and maneuvering ... it's mostly tragic though.  I don't think the man Saul had many outstanding days.  And ... it should be easy to learn from his mistakes ... but it isn't easy.  Our "little sacrifices"  ...  cheap little sacrifices when compared to obedience and certainly when imagined in light of Christ's sacrifice (because of disobedience).
Not very good notes, but the best I have time for for now ... I want to remember this idea ... .