The way to love someone
is to lightly run your finger over that person's soul
until you find a crack,
and then gently pour your love into that crack.
~Keith Miller

Thursday, November 3, 2016


Flowers on the table always remind me to be thankful.  They are different on the table than anywhere else in the house.  Flowers in the bathroom signals company is coming - lol.  Flowers in a bedroom, I'm sorry you're not feeling well, or happy birthday!

These little sunflowers are wilting fast, but we'll enjoy them while they last.

I have begun to think ahead for the Thanksgiving feast.

Turkey, cornbread dressing, creamy mashed potatoes, yeast rolls and plenty of gravy are mandatory on the menu.  The rest is up for change!

I like to keep it "not too much".  I'm thinking soup to start - maybe.  I'm also thinking of what to do with all that leftover turkey.  Tacos with chopped turkey, avocado slices and a spicy vegetable slaw was a tradition in the home I grew up in.  Turkey is surprisingly delicious on nachos too.  Our menus leaned heavily towards Mexican-American food.  They do in my kitchen too - the other day V said, "I just realized that I don't think of Mexican food as ethnic."  As my Spanish (Tex-Mex) vocabulary has diminished over the years I've noticed that the food words have remained! Which reminds me - I tasted a hint cumin in a cheesecake last week and it was kinda perfect.

Husband still out and about consulting out of State.  He'll be back mid month in time to spend the week with Three who will be in from Denver ... then Four, home for Thanksgiving.  She'll be back again a couple of weeks later bringing friends to  hang with us for a week or so.  Then Two will join us at home for Christmas and her boyfriend will come for a few days after Christmas.  One is in the area and we'll see him more often during this time.  I really like that my kids really like each other.

Five,aka V (V is what I really call her - the other's I never refer to numerically - only here for their privacy -), is home from school today with probably the flu.  She is by far the most diligent HS student I've ever known or known of.  I find myself in the pleasant situation of encouraging her to "lighten up" a bit on the books!  She wants to earn a full ride to somewhere special for college.  It must be tough being the youngest of five very solid achievers ... it's difficult to stand out the way we all desire to.  I tell her that siblings don't complete against each other, siblings support each other, but she does frequently compare herself to the finest attributes of the other four. I am grateful that she, like her brothers and sisters, is a great kid.  It's not easy these days.  I tell her that  I especially admire her willingness to act kindly towards others.  HS isn't the nicest time in a lot of peoples' lives.

Well ... three loads of laundry to fold, a bathroom to clean and a tiny bit of flu supplies shopping to see to - I'm thinking she may nibble on some homemade chicken and dumplings ... and Theuraflu.

Oh - one other thing.  Last night I wasn't sleepy.  I noticed something.  I used to have a small list of things I wanted to think about if things got quiet enough and still enough for me to think.  Sometimes I'd do reading on specific topics I wanted to think about to see what others had written on it.  I used to look forward to those nights when sleep wouldn't come or wouldn't stay.  When we found out my brother had cancer, I started playing a little game on my phone - like Yahtzee  ... push a button roll the dice or pop a bubble ... or find words in the maze of letters .. app games.  After he died I deleted most of them, but saved the two that had steps to completing all the rounds in the game.  I like to finish things that have a finish.  (I actually like to finish things that probably shouldn't have an end, but that's an entirely different thing.)  Now ... as I did when I was with Tommy, or even home, but thinking of Tommy, when I can't sleep or even when I have a minute to sit ... I am drawn to popping the bubbles or finding the words.  I am drawn to the habit of not thinking. It's a bit numbing.   I can see why I did that when my brother was dying - best to go on autopilot there - best not to think (for me anyway).  But now I can see that I really miss having a few interesting things to consider.  I need to break the easy habit and get back to the more enjoyable one.  So - I'm thinking about what I want to think about.

No comments: