He Hideth my Soul

Nabataean Petra

Petra is a Greek word that means cleft in the rock. Petra, also a place located in southern Jordan which has been included in the New Seven Wonders of the World.

The location of historical Petra is such that it controlled the main commercial routes which passed through it to Gaza, Bosra, Damascus, Aqaba ,Leuce come on the Red Sea, and across the desert to the Persian Gulf. It is said that settlements in Petra began near the eighteenth dynasty of Egypt.

Some speculate a prophetic significance as well. I like it as an image of a cleft in the rock ... A spiritual place of God's design.

"... match me such a marvel, save in Eastern clime
A rose-red city, half as old as time.
["Petra", John William Burgon]


He hideth my soul in the cleft of the rock
That shadows a dry, thirsty land;
He hideth my life with the depths of His love,
And covers me there with His hand,
And covers me there with His hand.~ song lyrics by Frances (Fanny) Crosby

When my glory passes by, I will put you in a cleft in the rock and cover you with my hand until I have passed ~ Exodus 33:22 NIV

L and I traveled up to the Apple store yesterday. He likes to talk on the phone while he drives. It's funny, when I am not in the car with him he calls me to chat ... when I'm sitting right there, not so much. Eventually we did talk though. I've been thinking about interpersonal relationships a lot lately. Certainly within the context of trust ... and what I'm labeling shelter for your soul. And I'm thinking about the relationships where my soul has been exposed ... and maybe where I've seen the very heart of others. I've been sorting through the relationships in my life, looking at what they mean or have meant to me. Something I would like to do better, is open my heart to more people. I think I have been too guarded in general. I don't know ... I'm thinking about it. I'm good at lend a hand and I think a big part of the reason that I can offer physical presence to help out is because I keep my heart out of it. I might be a little bit too good at compartmentalizing.

We talked a little bit about that. I said I think relationships are shelters which are built by people ... A friendship is a place to share yourself with another. I'm just thinking about it as an idea. It's difficult to express and my husband doesn't quite get what I'm talking about. Shelter to him is a building. He's not really into esoteric stuff. And that's okay. He totally understands my ability and inclination to compartmentalize. Hmmm ... What is that quote ... Brb.

"To love at all is to be vulnerable. Love anything and your heart will be wrung and possibly broken. If you want to make sure of keeping it intact you must give it to no one, not even an animal. Wrap it carefully round with hobbies and little luxuries; avoid all entanglements. Lock it up safe in the casket or coffin of your selfishness. But in that casket, safe, dark, motionless, airless, it will change. It will not be broken; it will become unbreakable, impenetrable, irredeemable. To love is to be vulnerable."~C.S. Lewis

Ouch, Mr. Lewis ... That's a little harsh! I feel the words biting a little close to the bone. Is it always selfishness that motivates one to keep their heart safe? I don't think so. In fact, I'm certain that life instructs you to be careful with your heart ... And especially the hearts that are open near you. But. Well, this quote is kinda near the crux of what I'm working with lately.

Yesterday, during church, I felt that heat near my heart that pushes tears right up to the rim of my eyes. I had to stop singing to collect myself. I turned my head to see the stain glass. The light coming in there is familiar ... comforting. Almost as familiar as that old song ... He Hideth my Soul. ...
A wonderful Savior is Jesus my Lord,
He taketh my burden away,
He holdeth me up and I shall not be moved,
He giveth me strength as my day.
.

Yesterday in the car, my husband said,"You seem happy. Happier then usual. What has happened to make you so happy? Can you put your finger on it?"
"I can't put my finger on it", I said looking at all the Southern green flowing by. "How long have you been noticing it?"
He thinks since I gave up on being hired to flight instruct. When he says that, I am glad I am looking out the window. (It was that day my soul just opened up ... a process began ... I can actually feel it happening ... and I rejoice and wonder) He says I tend to strive. Hmmm. Maybe ... I feel my soul shrug.
I don't think that is directly related to my new found ebullience. I am amazed to see a remembered me emerging ... a grown up version of pretty happy little her/me. There is a place on my in my heart where a burden has been removed ... not just lightened, removed, repaired, healed ... sealed. My soul remembers how to hold joy. That spot is still a little tender ... Like old wounds healing tend to be. That spot seeps little tiny shimmering thankful tears. Lately, I have remembered what it feels like to feel more.

I seem to be reintegrating. It's really cool. I like the shelter provided under the cover of God's hand.